The Purple Door: Domestic abuse: Never a fair fight

Published 8:00 am Saturday, March 24, 2018

Fighters are usually equally matched in weight, height and reach, but that was not the case – one was much larger and very experienced in throwing punches.  It was not the first time of course.  An argument had escalated to insults and threats and soon….well.

The bigger person surgically threw his punches, body blows to the chest and abdomen.  Areas that would hurt but could be covered up.

His wife rarely fought back, mostly just tried to cover up using arms to protect her face.  She usually ended up on the floor, curled into a fetal ball, silently enduring the pain until it was over.

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Afterward, she slowly got up and walked into the bathroom and began the cleaning process.  Clothing would hide most of the bruises, but this time, her eye was blackened. Makeup would help, and if not, she had her sunglasses.

She looked at the clock and thought she’d better hurry.  Her husband, a prominent physician, was being honored at their country club, and they couldn’t be late.

Domestic abusers can’t be defined by social or economic demographics.  Often, but not always, it is cultural, handed down from father to son to grandson.

In North Carolina, during a single day not long ago, there were more than 1,600 victims of domestic violence who sought refuge in emergency shelters.

If you or someone you know is suffering domestic violence or sexual assault, please know you are not alone.  Steps to HOPE is here for you.  Please call Steps to HOPE Crisis Line at 828-894-2340 or visit our website

written by Jay Davies