Archived Story

A single woman’s dinner plan

Published 11:17am Friday, June 22, 2012

“The beauty of today is in all the things: feeling the gentle breeze on your skin, the sunlight filtering through the clouds, the sound of the birds, the silence of no wind…” – Eckhart Tolle
Sometimes things happen that seem like a comedy routine,  and I think immediately of you, my reader out there in Bulletin land: the one who might need a laugh on a tough day. Anyway, today’s column is bound to bring a laugh, or at least a hint of a smile to your face. Let’s just say it could happen to the best of us!
Monday evening, soft June breezes kept me outside working diligently on a new sculpture project: suddenly the thought dawned on me it was way past din-din time.
Too busy (well, maybe the truth is more like LAZY) to cook something for just myself, I resorted to the single woman’s dinner plan. Box out of freezer. Nuke five minutes and chow’s on. (Actually the picture on the box looked pretty good — orange zest chicken, rice, steamed sugar snap peas in orange sauce — one of those healthy entrees, y’know.) The bowl gets popped in the microwave — it smells pretty good (obviously I’m desperate!) as it cooks. Taking the steaming bowl outside where I’m working, I plan to sit, eat and tweak the sculpture while the sun goes down, taking advantage of the balmy evening.
Strangely, the “food” looks dry and rather bland. Definitely not what’s pictured in living color on the box. Somebody lied, I think to myself as I poke around in the bowl. Maybe because it is dry…no sauce, no nothing other than shriveled snap peas, rice pellets and rubberized chicken bits: I even put glasses on to inspect more closely. The “Rawhide” theme runs through my mind as I stare at the offerings. None of this is fare that is delicious in a dry withered state. I think about dumping it for a pimento cheese sandwich. Or maybe slathering barbecue sauce on the whole shebang and chewing until dawn. I’ve managed to down a few bites, but it’s not looking good on finishing.

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