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Dear Aunty Pam,

 

Please, please help me. My husband isn’t speaking to me and neither is his mama. The problem is I am 7 months pregnant with our first baby and on my husband’s side, they want to honor the first name of my husband’s grandfather because none of my husband’s brothers or sisters did. He was evidently an important man in Georgia and so all the pressure is on us to name our baby after this man. Aunty Pam, the grandfather’s name was Cleatus and I just CAN’T name our baby that!! It’s awful!!! Unfortunately, our baby is going to be a boy, not a girl, so there’s no way out. My husband is really angry that I won’t even consider the name and my Mother-in-law keeps making these remarks like, “Well, it’s your baby, I guess, you can call it what you want,” and then heaves a big sigh.

 

Nobody is asking how I feel about this or even seems to care that I hate the name. I don’t think it’s the least bit fair and  this is just stressing me out. Please help me!!

 

Preggers and Miserable

 

Dear PM,

 

I’ve got your back on this one, girlfriend. That is one tough name to reckon with.

 

Or…is it? Let’s go to the google machine: Cleatus is of Greek origin and the meaning is ‘Glory.’ Niiiiice! It’s derived from Kleitos, the name of one of Alexander the Great’s generals. There was even a Saint Cletus (first century) who was elected Pope in AD 76

 

So that sort of makes it more palatable and exotic, doesn’t it, and sounds far less like a bloodhound or a clogging instructor. And there’s a bonus too—it’s perfectly acceptable to be pronounced either CLEE-TUS or CLAY-TUS, and, personally, Aunty Pam thinks ‘Claytus’ sounds rather continental.

 

But the bigger point here is that YOU’RE the one hauling around this soon to be human in your belly and no one is giving you the time of day or respecting your opinion—or even asking your opinion, which is downright shameful, not to mention dangerous, considering your hormone levels and proclivity to sharp kitchen utensils. 

 

Aunty Pam suggests a pow wow with the hubs (the MIL can go suck eggs and stay out of it) and let him know, frankly, how hurt and justifiably angry you are to be pushed into a corner with no thought to your welfare. And that the baby’s name will NOT be registered until you both reach an agreement that suits you both. For the sake of a peaceful household, there will probably have to be a bit of compromise on both your parts, but what’s important is that YOUR opinion be heard and respected along with his.

 

Best of luck and happy nappies!!

 

Cheers, dear!

Aunty Pam