Santa listens in on Community Chorus rehearsals

Published 10:00 pm Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Community Chorus rehearsals are becoming more intense as Dec. 14 fast approaches, and Santa Claus, who reportedly knows when we are sleeping and when we are awake, has been aware that Candy Wilson has begun to lose a bit of sleep with nightmares about missed notes, off-key voices, and absent singers. He knows that it’s flu season and thought it odd that the chorus was singing about that, but he took a closer look at the music list with his glasses on and realized the chorus is singing a new piece called, “Cold and Fugue Season.”

“Whatever,” Santa muttered, and he decided to pay attention to the separate choral parts in an effort to help Candy.

Among the sopranos, he heard wishes for more solo parts, for extra high notes, and for a little more appreciation from the other voices in the choir. He also watched as they raised their eyebrows when high notes came their way, so he added tweezers to the list of every single soprano so it will be easier for them to practice with that expression after they have tweezed any wandering eyebrows. He also saw them warming up their mouth muscles and tongues, probably for “Carol of the Bells” he realized. And he did see a couple of women look disdainfully at the tenors and basses, as they whispered, “Oh, those ding dongs, how easy is that!”

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When Santa moved over to the bass section, he heard a different story. “Our dings and dongs are perfect. Why can’t those sopranos keep up?”

Then he heard a couple of men wish for ear plugs for some unspecified screeching, but no one was named. He also heard one or two wish they could sit in the front rows. “We are always in the back. We’re tired of the back rows. We are just as good as the tenors, and much more handsome. Plus, we are the anchors – our voices are the most important.”

He heard a couple add, “And why can’t we ever have any solos? The sopranos get all the best notes.”

Santa shook his head and jotted on his list to put nuts in each of their stockings and hope they would get the point.

If you want to hear what Santa is hearing, plan to come to Polk County High School on Sunday afternoon, Dec. 14, for the 3 p.m. Community Chorus Christmas Concert. It promises to be an afternoon of fun, and it benefits the Scholarship Fund of the Rotary Club of Tryon. Tickets are available at the door, or can be purchased from chorus members or members of the Rotary Club of Tryon.

–Submitted by Gloria Underwood